Understanding Emotions: The Three Ways We Deal with them.

Emotions are an integral part of the human experience. They inform our decisions, shape our relationships, and influence our overall wellbeing. However, navigating our emotional landscape can be challenging, and many of us employ different strategies to cope with our feelings

Dr. David Hawkins, a renowned psychiatrist and author, identifies three primary ways in which humans tend to deal with emotions: repression, expression, and distraction. Understanding these approaches can help us cultivate healthier emotional habits and improve our emotional intelligence.

 1. Repression: The Silent Struggle

Repression is a common coping mechanism where individuals unconsciously push their emotions out of their conscious awareness. While this may seem like a temporary solution to avoid emotional pain or discomfort, it can lead to significant issues over time.

The Dangers of Repression:

- Physical Manifestations: Repressed emotions often find a way to surface physically. Stress, anxiety, and tension can manifest in various forms, including headaches, digestive issues, and other health problems.

- Emotional Bottleneck: Suppressing emotions can create an emotional bottleneck, leading to explosive outbursts when feelings become too intense to contain. This can strain relationships and create further distress.

- Loss of Self-Awareness: Constantly repressing emotions can diminish self-awareness, making it difficult to understand our true feelings and desires. This lack of awareness can hinder personal growth and fulfillment.

 2. Expression: The Healthy Release

Expression involves openly sharing and communicating our emotions, whether through words, art, or physical activity. This approach allows for healthy emotional release and can lead to greater self-awareness and connection with others.

Benefits of Expression:

- Emotional Clarity: By expressing our feelings, we gain clarity on our emotional state. This understanding can empower us to make informed decisions and respond to situations more effectively.

- Strengthened Relationships: Sharing our emotions fosters intimacy and connection in our relationships. When we express our feelings, we invite others to do the same, creating a supportive environment for open communication.

- Stress Relief: Healthy expression, whether through talking, writing, or creative outlets, can be a powerful stress-reliever. It allows us to process emotions and release pent-up energy, leading to a sense of relief and release.

3. Distraction: The Temporary Escape

Distraction is a coping mechanism where individuals divert their attention away from uncomfortable emotions. This can manifest in various forms, such as binge-watching TV shows, excessive social media use, or engaging in other unsupportive activities to avoid facing feelings.

Drawbacks of Distraction:

- Emotional Bypass: While distraction may provide temporary relief, it often leads to emotional bypass. Unaddressed emotions can resurface later, often more intensely, creating a cycle of avoidance.

- Increased Anxiety: Relying on distractions can lead to increased anxiety and feelings of emptiness. When we avoid our emotions, we miss the opportunity to understand and process them, leading to unresolved issues.

- Superficial Connections: Distraction can hinder the development of meaningful connections with ourselves and others. When we focus on external stimuli to escape our feelings, we may miss opportunities for genuine emotional engagement.

The Importance of Feeling Emotions

It’s vital to recognize that emotions, whether positive or negative, serve a purpose. They are signals that provide insight into our needs, desires, and boundaries. 

By allowing ourselves to fully feel and process our emotions, we can gain deeper self-awareness and emotional resilience.

Practices such as Breathwork can be instrumental in this process. Breathwork techniques encourage mindful breathing, which helps to calm the nervous system and create a safe space for emotions to surface. Here’s how breathwork can support emotional processing:

- Facilitates Emotional Release: Breathwork can help release pent up emotions that may be stuck in the body. As we breathe deeply and consciously, we create space for feelings to arise and be processed.

- Enhances Mind-Body Connection: By focusing on our breath, we strengthen the connection between our mind and body. This awareness allows us to tune in to our emotions and respond to them more effectively.

- Promotes Relaxation and Clarity: Engaging in breathwork can induce a state of relaxation, making it easier to confront and feel emotions without judgment. This clarity can lead to healthier emotional regulation and decision-making.

 Finding Balance: A Path Forward

Understanding these three approaches—repression, expression, and distraction, can help us develop healthier emotional habits. Here are some strategies to cultivate emotional awareness and well-being:

- Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness can help you become more aware of your emotions as they arise. By observing your feelings without judgment, you can better understand your emotional landscape.

- Create a Safe Space for Expression: Find healthy outlets for expressing your emotions. This could be through journaling, talking with a trusted friend, or engaging in creative activities that allow for emotional release.

- Incorporate Breathwork: Explore breathwork practices to help process and release emotions. By focusing on your breath, you can create a safe and nurturing environment for your feelings to surface.

- Limit Distractions: While it’s natural to seek comfort in distractions, be mindful of how often you rely on them. Set aside time to sit with your feelings and process them, rather than pushing them aside.

 Conclusion

Emotions are a natural part of being human, and how we respond to them can significantly impact our wellbeing. 

By understanding the three primary ways we deal with emotions repression, expression, and distraction and recognizing the importance of feeling our emotions, we can cultivate a more balanced and healthy emotional life.

 Embracing expression and practicing mindfulness, including breathwork, can lead to deeper self-awareness and stronger connections with those around us.

If you’re interested in exploring your emotional landscape more deeply, consider joining my upcoming "Discover Your Spark" workshop, where we will delve into emotional intelligence, mindset coaching, and much more.

STAY tuned for enrollment details STARTING May 2025

https://www.karlimckeowncoaching.com.au/